Last three months, my husband went to attend a course in Lagos for two weeks, there he had an affair with a lady, she met at the course. He came back and hid this affair for all that time but during this lockdown he hasn't been acting well. Last week, he revealed his affair saying he cant hide it anymore.
I also had to send an email to my sister in the US that wants to assist us with some money this period, so on using his computer, I saw email communications he had with the lady. Love mails, and some inappropriate pictures of both.
Since then I have been depressed and we've been fighting and arguing alot. He complained I was not a good wife, and he was angry with me and that was why he fell for the lady, she works in another branch of his office.
I have realized that the marriage isn't working. I want to file for divorce. We have a 5 year old son.
Kindly suggest best option for me.
(Sinach)
Dear Sinach,
I understand what you’re feeling right now and why you want to file for a divorce right away. However, it is my counsel that you take it easy and slowly in reaching a conclusion on this matter. I’m sure talking with an elder in the church or the family will help a great deal. As a matter of fact, our Courts will not entertain any suit for divorce unless it is convinced that the marriage has broken down irretrievably and all efforts to settle the parties have failed. To show how serious this condition is, a written statement to this effect is required to be signed by the Attorney filing the suit. The Court will in most cases also require preliminary oral evidence of attempted settlement or even further explore settlement before proceeding to hear the suit for divorce.
Accordingly, if at the end of failed settlement attempts it becomes apparent that the marriage has broken down irretrievably and it is no longer possible for you to reasonably continue to live with your husband, you will need to retain the services of a lawyer to assist you with the filing of a suit for dissolution of marriage and represent you in court. The lawyer will require information such as the issues that led to the break down to enable him reduced it properly into writing, the plans for the custody of the child and other things such as maintainance and properties. He will also require a copy of the marriage certificate from you as this is also a requirement filing the suit.
Best regards,
Val O’Julu, Esq.